The Gear

It's been a long while since I posted but we've survived the swine flu, 2 ear infections, and a move to a new house in the past month.



New babies require lots of gear but the amount of stuff on the market is ridiculous! I think so many new moms think they have to get everything that is out there and as far as I'm concerned, forget about it. When Babies R Us gives you a 6 page guide to what you should register for, it is because they'll be getting the money from all of those useless items that they make you believe you need : ) Here's my guide to registry items. You should know that my priorities are convenience and space saving. Your priorities might be different so choose what works for you. Also, if you think you'll need something down the road, register for it now! No, you won't use that high chair for several months but Aunt Jean is looking for some place to spend her money and you're going to use it eventually. If people want to spend their money on your baby, go ahead and let them. You'll have plenty of well-baby co-pays in the first year to spend your own money on - and that's just when they're well!

The things I couldn't have too many of:

Bibs - Not just tiny newborn ones! I really wished we had some bigger bibs once our little one got to the baby food stage.

Burp rags

Footie pajamas

Spoons (when you're in the baby food/cereal phase, we really used a bunch of these)

Wash cloths and hooded towels; I would recommend getting some bigger hooded towels as well (think toddler sized) because they outgrow the little ones quickly.

Receiving blankets - bigger receiving blankets are great! We swaddled both of our kiddos for several months and they sleep like angels.

Diapers - in a variety of sizes. You'll really only need about 1 pack of the newborn size.



The survival gear:

Car seat - make sure to check out the buckle!! Ours is horribly inconvenient and I wish I would have tried it in person instead of ordering it online.

The travel system? No thank you! Most of the strollers that were part of the "travel system" were horribly bulky. We opted for this instead and love it! It is compact and I can wrangle it with 1 hand when I have a car seat in the other.

The umbrella stroller - we went straight to this from the car seat stroller. We have to travel to visit family and it is ideal for air travel!

The sling/baby pack - I didn't use this at all with my first but now that I have 2, it is life-saving. I mean how do you take 2 small children to the grocery store without it?? I have a Baby Bjorn Air carrier (purchased on Ebay for $50). It is really great and designed to be cool.

The baby bath tub - this one was perfect because it transitions as they grow. It was the only tub we used until she was ready to bath in the big tub.

A Pack'n'Play - We used this as our bassinet when we first came home and then continued to use it when we traveled and as the baby grew and needed to be contained.



The luxury items:

It is ok to register for some pricey items! Some people will team up on gifts and some people just want to buy you a big item.

A Jogging stroller - it is like the difference between a sports car and a Honda (no offense to the Honda owners! I'm sure it's a great car, but it just won't handle like a Porsche). We always take the jogging stroller when we go on our nightly walks. There is nothing wrong with owning 3 strollers : ) Our older child is 1 year old and all three of these strollers have been well worn!

A video monitor - We have this one. It is extra-great because it is portable. This was one of the best gifts that we got! At first I thought it was creepy to watch your baby in night vision but I was completely wrong!!! You will sleep more at ease being able to peek in on your newborn and when my 1 year old got the flu, we got it back out again so that we could keep an eye on her when she was really sick.

A breast pump - If you are really going to stick with breast feeding and you're a working mom, this is really a must have item. My girlfriend purchased the Medella Pump In Style and it was a great pump (you can purchase the kits that go with the pump separately so a few of us have used the same pump).



Miscellaneous:

A shopping cart cover

Disposable bibs - you can buy these at Target and they are so great when you are out & about. When they are covered in bright orange carrots or sweet potatoes, you can just throw them away instead of putting them back in your diaper bag.

Lily Padz - These are so great! I wouldn't recommend them in the early stages of breast feeding but once you get into a routine, they are wonderful. Definitely easier on The Girls than the disposable nursing pads.





The stuff I could really live without:

The diaper genie - The refills are expensive, it fills up quickly, and frankly, once they get past bottles, nothing is going to eliminate the smell. A Wal Mart trash can with a lid is equally as effective.

My extremely cute, but non-functional diaper bag.

If you have friends with babies, don't be afraid to trade items! We borrowed our swing, bumbo seat, bouncer, and exersaucer. They are all bulky items and are all going to be used for a limited amount of time. Most baby gear is removable and washable so I just throw it in the wash before I send it back to the original owners. I also recommend picking big items that are gender neutral. I am sooooo thankful we didn't find out the gender of our babies because all of our necessity items were gender neutral. My best advice for baby gear is choose the items that you feel will fit your lifestyle and think long term (not just tiny newborn).

Deep Thoughts

In order to save time, is it OK to heat up a bottle in your morning coffee? He He

You're Living In Denial Fatty

I might be the only one with this issue but at the end of my pregnancy I was living in some serious denial of the sheer size of my body. I had always recognized that I wasn't one of those pregnant sticks with a volleyball on the front, but I wasn't huge either (that is what I told myself). I got to enjoy pregnancy in one of the hottest summers in state history so we spent a lot of quality time at the pool. I would see other unfortunate pregnant souls there as well and would say to my husband, "at least I'm not that big". He is a saint for just letting me think that. At some point I think I realized that I was kidding myself and that is probably what all of those ladies were saying about me!

Ashoo

The good news about motherhood is that your child will be a comedian and not even mean to! This weekend on a 2 hour road trip, our newborn sneezed in the car and Mommy said "bless you". A few minutes later, our 1-year-old starts making "ashooo" sounds and shaking her head until we said "bless you" to her. This continued the rest of the trip and we laughed every time. Now she follows up every real sneeze that she has with 2 fake ones. I can't wait to hear some of the things she'll say down the road : )

Helpful Tip #4

Avoid the mommy blogs that make you feel inadequate. Don't compare yourself to other moms. You are doing a great job no matter what you think!
There is always going to be someone out there making her own baby food from the organic vegetables she grew in her garden while also home schooling her 6 kids and looking beautiful for her man.....well at least that's what she'll tell you ; )

Joining the LPGA

Have you ever watched the LPGA (Ladies Professional Golf Assoc). tour? Well many of these ladies wear unflattering, too tight, pleated pants that result in an unsightly pooch in the front. My dad has affectionately titled it the "front butt" because it does in fact look like you have a butt on your front!
Well should you be fortunate enough to have a c-section, you can plan on having a front butt for a good long while afterwards. It's like having a separate entity attached to your tummy and is especially noticeable when you're sitting. I really think mine should have her own name like Olga or Doris. I guess it's a combination of scar tissue and swelling from surgery but it's in no hurry to leave you. I've lost 30 pounds since I had the 2nd baby and Doris is still hanging on for dear life.
So one Sunday afternoon if you flip over to ESPN 8 (the ocho) watch for me in my khaki, pleated dockers because I might just grab my husband's clubs and head out on tour.

Big Mama's House

Are you feeling discouraged about your pregnancy weight gain? This should help you feel better: during my first pregnancy I gained 50 pounds. I had a lot of swelling towards the end but either way you slice that pie, it's still a BIG pie.
One my second pregnancy, I gained the recommended 30 (but you should also know that I got pregnant about 3.5 months after my daughter was born so I still had a pesky 19 pounds hanging on). So both times I arrived right at my magic pregnancy number.
Now begins the process of losing the weight. If I had given birth to a 5th grader, I'd probably already be back to where I started but seeing as how both of my babies were right around 7 pounds, there's plenty left to lose. I like to say that some people carry the baby in their bellies and I carried my babies in my hips and thighs : )
Let me break it down for you in numbers:
My pre-pregnancy weight - 130lbs
Pregnancy weight both times - 180ish
Pre-2nd pregnancy weight - 149
Current weight - 151
The Plan:
The Southbeach Diet is our preferred method of weight loss (the hubby has some pregnancy pounds to lose also - every good man should). The reason is because I could go through life living on side dishes and desserts alone. I would be a fattie but I would be a happy fattie. This diet forces me to put down the refined sugars and simple carbohydrates and embrace the main course. I have zero will power so I really need a plan that just tells me what I can and cannot have. So far, I've lost 9 pounds (no, I'm not counting the weight lost right after the baby was born).
Here's my secret - the true key to weight loss success is competition and monetary reward. I'm competing with some coworkers in a Biggest Loser type competition where the winner walks away with the pot of about $150.00. I am fiercely competitive and plan to blow them all out of the water and use the money to go shopping for non-maternity clothes for the first time in 2 years : )
The ultimate goal:
To be back to 130 lbs by June 1st, 2010. We'll be going on our first real vacation since our honeymoon and mama needs to look good in a swim suit. You can track my progress on my handy-dandy weight loss ticker. I'll update it each week when I weigh in.

Helpful Tip #3

Breastmilk storage:

If you plan on breastfeeding and hope to be able to freeze the milk to use down the road, I suggest laying the bags flat on their sides to freeze them. It will use about half the space.
Also, "breast milk storage bags" that you buy in the baby section are like $9 for 45.....Ziplock freezer bags are like $3 for 45. I choose Ziplocks!

The Good Stuff

So a friend of mine is expecting right now and she just posted a blog about hearing her baby's heartbeat for the first time and I'm reminded about the handful of things that I did enjoy about pregnancy.

The way she put it was so true - up until you hear that sound, it's really hard to believe that there's anything in there. Aside from the 3 months of feeling hung over you really have nothing to show for being pregnant. Hearing your baby's heartbeat for the first time is the sweetest sound on earth, especially your first baby. Our second baby was a total "blessing" and was due just a few weeks after our daughter's first birthday so when we heard his heartbeat we were a little more like "oh gosh....there's really another baby in there!" : )

The other greatest thing about pregnancy is feeling that little guy/girl move around in there. The books describe the first kicks as "butterfly's wings or little bubbles". Well if you can figure out what the heck that means, let me know. Here's how I would describe it. I think I started to feel it around 16 weeks and it felt like I had a twitch inside my belly. Have you ever had your eye lid twitch when you're really tired or an overworked muscle have a little spasm? That's exactly how the little kicks feel for a while. Just wait to you feel that little stinker give you a People's Elbow to your bladder - it will be a quick lesson that you will no longer wait to go to the bathroom. Your hubby will be a little jealous because you will get to feel it for a while before he can (about 3-5 weeks later) but as far as I'm concerned, this is just a small bit of justice for women who have to go through pregnancy and labor.

The other good things about pregnancy:

1. You get pampered - eat it up on your first pregnancy because things are different the 2nd time around.

2. You get to go through the whole process of registries and showers again and who doesn't love to get new stuff?

3. Naps are permitted and encouraged (this is also only a 1st timer luxury).

Now, since I did a little bit of a feel-good post, I'll also include a feel good picture. I know that you newly preggies can't wait for that belly to arrive. Well get ready because she's comin and she's gonna be BIG!

Helpful Tip #2

This is a follow up to the weight gain post:

Always schedule your prenatal appointments first thing in the morning and wear your lightest clothing and flip flops (even if it is the dead of winter). I would actually wait to eat until after my appointments the first time I was pregnant : )
Also, you should never ever schedule one appointment in the morning and then schedule your next appointment in the afternoon because they are going to look at you accusingly when your weight jumps 5 pounds and your doctor might tell you to chew gum instead of having snacks (seriously, that is what my doctor told me).

Pregnancy Weight Gain

So in the first trimester of pregnancy, the books will tell you that you're probably not gaining much weight because you feel so crappy right? Hmmm...the first time I was pregnant I think I gained like 10-15 pounds in the first trimester (thanks for making me feel good pregnancy authors).
It is my firm belief (without any scientific data) that all women have a predetermined pregnancy weight. Some of you weighed 40 pounds before you got pregnant and you will have a little volleyball belly and will fit into your size 2's the week after you deliver (even though you ate KFC 4 times per week during your pregnancy). Others of you will subsist on whole grain toast and salads and grilled chicken for the entire time and you will gain 50 pounds.
Here's my story:
I was so terrified of pregnancy weight gain so I really set out to eat only healthy things. I took healthy snacks to work and drank water like it was going out of style. At each appointment I gained like 2-3lbs. I had a doctor who was pretty strict about weight gain too so he was reminding me at each appointment what I should be eating. I'm sure he believed me to be a big fat (literally) liar as I recounted what I was eating. Part of the problem is that there are 2 scales at my doctor's office and one of them weighs heavier I swear! So by the end of pregnancy #1 I had gained 50 pounds! Let me also say that we walked daily and I did pregnancy yoga and I was very active throughout my pregnancy.
Pregnancy #2 - I ate what I wanted and didn't set foot outside unless it was to go to a pool or the lake. It was too dang hot outside during the day and our daughter goes to bed at 8 when it was still in the mid 90's out so there was no walking for me. I ate more than my share of restaurant foods and we had dessert almost nightly. At one of my appointments towards the end (when you're supposed to be packing it on) I actually lost a pound! The doctor was concerned that I wasn't eating enough or that I was over-exercising...HA! The real culprit was that they had weighed me on the cursed digital scale the week before and it said I was a fatty! In the end, I only gained 30 pounds this time but still arrived at my same magic number (still had 19 pounds to lose from the first round).
The moral of this long and rambling story is that in pregnancy you're going to be BIG or REAL BIG so just eat what you would normally eat (not everything in sight though).

Suggested Reading

Here's the list of things that I enjoyed reading during pregnancy and the first year of having a baby:

Light Hearted Reads:
Belly Laughs by Jenny McCarthy (completely inappropriate, but also HILARIOUS).
My Boys Can Swim - this is technically for daddies but I enjoyed it just as much! I don't know any guy that wants to read The Expectant Father etc....This book even has illustrations.

For Real Info:
The Week by Week Guide to Pregnancy
The Week by Week Guide to Your Baby's First Year

For Parenting:
The Bible! You're going to need this book more than any other! It is the absolute best resource on parenting and a great reminder that those precious little poop makers are sent into your life by the Lord and He never makes mistakes!

What's missing from this list? What to Expect When You're Expecting aka The Pregnancy Bible. I'm sorry, but for me, reading this book was like shopping at Ross. I need my clothing and my reading material to be well organized and relevant. Isn't there an entire chapter in What to Expect about drug use during pregnancy? Like women who smoke crack are reading up on having a healthy pregnancy?!? I just don't have the patience for this book or for Ross....although Ross was the best resource for maternity clothes - one of the many ironies of pregnancy for me.

If you want to be a little weirded out but also completely amazed by the process of pregnancy, there is a National Geographic movie called In the Womb.

Are there any other good reads out there for pregnancy?

Helpful Tip #1

Are you terrified about cutting your newborn's finger nails? If you aren't, you should be! I know I was until my girlfriend gave me this golden piece of advice:

Bite their nails!

Little newborn finger nails are too flimsy to file and they are so spastic that it is truly difficult to use those little clippers. Those clippers are super sharp too. It is much easier and safer in my book to bite them! If this grosses you out and you're judging me right now, it's ok because I know that you will bite your little one's nails in secret from now on just for the peace of mind that you won't be cutting off his/her little finger!

Sleep Deprivation

The Timeline:
November, 2007 - Pregnant with Baby #1
July, 2008 - Life with a newborn begins
December, 2008 - Surprise!! I'm pregnant again
August, 2009 - Baby #2 is born

If you do the math on this, I haven't had a solid night's sleep in like 2 years and we're only on week 3 with the new baby. I can't even blame it on the kids either. Pregnancy was way worse as far as sleepless nights. During the first trimester I had to go to the bathroom all night long. Most nights I would say I averaged 3 times but there were some nights that I was up 6 or more times! (yeah, I counted). Now allegedly this is supposed to lessen during the 2nd trimester....it doesn't. You're still going to average 2-3 times per night and then it spikes again during the 3rd trimester. Plus, during the third trimester every little ache makes you wonder if "it's time" which makes it impossible to sleep. If you dare to voice a complaint about your lack of sleep during the 3rd trimester, it is inevitable that some bleeding heart will tell you "It's just preparing you for those sleepless nights with a newborn". Um yeah, I can easily see how walking to the bathroom 6 times a night to pee is the same as waking up to provide love/food/care to your newborn...??? At least when you're getting up to feed your baby, you have accomplished something!
Now I need to confess that I have the best babies on the face of the planet because we get way more sleep than the average new parent. Beware though; even if you have babies that sleep like angels, you're still going to worry at every little sound. It was real neat (sarcasm) having a first born that chit-chatted all night long while she was asleep. She got moved to her own room REAL fast because I was constantly wondering if she was awake or not.....regarding evicting her to her own room - there will be a future post entitled "Am I A Bad Mom If..."

The Disclaimer

I am 100% sure that children are a gift from the Lord. Being a mom is a special honor and responsibility and I cherish and adore my kids. That being said, I've had two kids in two years so my body is a freakin' war zone and there has been some crazy and funny times in the past two years that deserve to be shared. There are some women in this world who love every minute of being pregnant...this Mama isn't one of them! I'm way too practicial and honest to go on and on about the joys of pregnancy. I want you to know the truth about pregnancy and motherhood and I hope to share some of the priceless things I've learned along the way. I hope that all of you other moms that read this blog will share your words of wisdom as well. My oldest child is only 1 year so it's not like I'm an expert about parenting by any means but I have learned some helpful tips along the way that I didn't come across in any of the books or classes. If you don't have a sense of humor or the ability to decipher thick sarcasm, you should probably look for another blog to read.